MARRIAGE \ Miscellaneous \
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In the Name of Allaah, All Compassionate, All Merciful
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Advice to "old maids"

Question: I would like your advice concerning a matter that affects me and my fellow sisters. This matter is that it has been written [by Allaah] for us that we should live without a husband. We have passed through the age of marriage and we are getting close to menopause. This is the case even though, and all praises are due to Allaah and Allaah is witness to what I state, we are women of character and we have all earned college degrees.

However, this is what is destined for us and all praises are due to Allaah. It is simply financial reasons that have kept people from proposing to us. The customs surrounding a marriage, especially in our land, are built upon cooperation between the spouses concerning what will take place in the future. I ask for your advice for me and my sisters.

Response: The advice that I direct to such women who have delayed marriage is what was suggested in the question itself: they should turn to Allaah with supplications and submission so that Allaah may grant them one whose religion and character is pleasing to them. If a person sincerely and resolutely turns to Allaah, seeking His help, following the manners of supplications and being free of anything that prevents supplications from being answered, then Allaah has said:

{And when My servants ask you [Muhammad] concerning me, then (answer them), I am indeed near (to them by My knowledge). I respond to the invocations of the supplicant when he calls on Me}, [Soorah al-Baqarah, Aayah 186).

Another verse states:

{And your Lord said, 'Invoke Me, I will respond to your (invocation)}, [Soorah Ghaafir, Aayah 60].

Allaah has stated that the response to the invocation comes after the person responds to Allaah and believes in Him. I do not see anything stronger than turning to Allaah, supplicating to Him humbling oneself to Him and waiting for the solution. It has been confirmed that the Prophet (sal-Allaahu `alayhe wa sallam) said:

((Know that victory comes with patience, relief with distress and ease with hardship)).

I ask Allaah for these women and others like them that Allaah makes their affairs easy and grants them pious husbands who marry them for betterment in their religion and worldly lives.

And Allaah knows best.

Shaykh Ibn 'Uthaymeen
Fataawa al-Mar.ah