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Advice
to "old maids"
Question:
I would like your advice concerning a matter that affects
me and my fellow sisters. This matter is that it has been
written [by Allaah] for us that we should live without a husband.
We have passed through the age of marriage and we are getting
close to menopause. This is the case even though, and all
praises are due to Allaah and Allaah is witness to what I
state, we are women of character and we have all earned college
degrees.
However,
this is what is destined for us and all praises are due to
Allaah. It is simply financial reasons that have kept people
from proposing to us. The customs surrounding a marriage,
especially in our land, are built upon cooperation between
the spouses concerning what will take place in the future.
I ask for your advice for me and my sisters.
Response:
The advice that I direct to such women who have delayed marriage
is what was suggested in the question itself: they should
turn to Allaah with supplications and submission so that Allaah
may grant them one whose religion and character is pleasing
to them. If a person sincerely and resolutely turns to Allaah,
seeking His help, following the manners of supplications and
being free of anything that prevents supplications from being
answered, then Allaah has said:
{And
when My servants ask you [Muhammad] concerning me, then (answer
them), I am indeed near (to them by My knowledge). I respond
to the invocations of the supplicant when he calls on Me},
[Soorah
al-Baqarah, Aayah
186).
Another
verse states:
{And
your Lord said, 'Invoke Me, I will respond to your (invocation)},
[Soorah
Ghaafir, Aayah
60].
Allaah has stated that the response to the invocation comes
after the person responds to Allaah and believes in Him. I
do not see anything stronger than turning to Allaah, supplicating
to Him humbling oneself to Him and waiting for the solution.
It has been confirmed that the Prophet (sal-Allaahu
`alayhe wa sallam)
said:
((Know
that victory comes with patience, relief with distress and
ease with hardship)).
I
ask Allaah for these women and others like them that Allaah
makes their affairs easy and grants them pious husbands who
marry them for betterment in their religion and worldly lives.
And
Allaah knows best.
Shaykh
Ibn 'Uthaymeen
Fataawa al-Mar.ah
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